Essay-Which of the two paragraphs has stronger paragraph unity-The legend-in Africa-that all elephants over a large geographical area go to a common “graveyard” when they sense death is approaching led many hunters to treat them with special cruelty. Ivory hunters, believing the myth and trying to locate such graveyards, often intentionally wounded an elephant in the hopes of following the suffering beast as it make its way to the place where it wanted to die. The idea was to wound the elephant seriously enough so that it thought it was going to die but not so seriously that it died in a very short time. All too often, the process resulted in a single elephant being shot or speared many times and relentlessly pursued until it either fell dead or was killed when it finally turned and charged its attackers. In any case, no wounded elephant ever led its pursuers to the mythical graveyard with its hoped-for-booty of ivory tusks.
Paragraph 2.
It is important that the scale figures for CDs keep slumping since it is easier and more convenient to download the music buyers want from the Internet. The online music stores, such as i-tunes, are very easy to use with simple instructions for searching for music and making purchases. Music fans can quickly find the performers or albums of their choice, even obscure works, from the convenience of their living room without having to drive from store to store. Then they can buy either songs or entire albums that interest them. Once down-loaded they can either burn a CD to play on more traditional stereos or coy the music to an mp3 player of some kind. the effects have been devastating on the music retail industry. Major stores such as Tower Records went out of business. Barnes and Noble has a cut back on the number of CDs that the chain sells. The shift to online distribution of music has had the added advantage allowing alternative groups to present their music that they would have had trouble getting made into CDs and distributed through major chains. This also ends the potential impact of major chains such as Wal-mart on what music is sold.
Which of the two paragraphs has stronger paragraph unity?
In what ways is the stronger paragraph stronger?
What are the elements of its strength?
What are some ways that you would improve the weakly unified paragraph?
